"You need new bearings, your shit is messed up."
Sorry, what? How did you get that from Paul's post?
Paul, the "too tight," and "more loose" feeling that you get when you adjust your wheel bearings is exactly right. Who knows, your bearings could be shot to hell, but it doesn't sound like it. If you want, you can always disassemble your wheels to check.
Here is how to adjust cup and cone bearings:
Prep) Ideally, you should remove the wheel from your bike, remove the axle (over a rag to catch loose bearings if you have them) clean and regrease everything, and then loosely re-assemble the axle assembly. Or, you could just begin at step 1.
1) With your wheel off the bike, loosen the nut, and the cone on one side of the axle. You want to be able to spin either of them freely.
2) Make sure the cone and securing nut on the other side of the axle are securely counter-tightened. This is how your adjustments are kept in place; you hold the cone nut with a cone wrench (really just a very flat wrench), and then tighten the securing nut down on top of it (sort of like you are screwing them together).
3) Seat the cone on the "other side" mentioned above, and then return to the cone that you freed in step 1. Using only your hand, screw just the cone down into the cup until it gets hard to turn.
At this point, your axle should be fully installed with the exception of the cone securing nut on one side, and your wheel should be able to spin (but will have that "too tight," crunchy sort of feel you mentioned).
4) Begin unscrewing the cone nut from the unsecured side by half turns. Each time you turn the cone nut around about half of a revolution, feel for side-to-side play in the axle.
This is the only way to find the correct adjustment! You cannot reverse this procedure - e.g. do not screw in the cone until you find a place where it seems to be seated!
5) Eventually, you'll unscrew the cone about halfway, feel for side-to-side play, and find that there is a barely-felt "click" - you've reached the point where the cone is a little bit too loose. This means that you just passed the correct position for the cone - screw the cone in about a quarter turn until you feel as though you've made up for the slight "click."
This is a somewhat subjective adjustment, and a very small one - just go for it.
6) After your last adjustment, your two sets of cups and cones should be in exactly the right adjustment - the trick now is to keep them that way while securing the cone you tightened last. Use a cone wrench, or any kind of flat grasping tool to hold that cone you adjusted last in place.
7) Finally, without turning either of the two cone nuts in relation to each other, screw the securing nut down on top of the cone you adjusted last. At this point you should see why you need a cone wrench, or cone wrench substitution - the cone nut has very thin flats.
If you make the touchy adjustment from step 5 correctly, and then go carefully through the remaining steps to avoid messing up your adjustment, your cup and cone bearings will perform as well as sealed bearings (but will still require more care during service - it's OK, sealed bearing supporters!).
Finally, just another reminder: You cannot tell the correct cone adjustment by screwing the cone IN, only by screwing the cone OUT until you feel some play, and then making that tiny guess to find the correct position. This can be counter-intuitive, and is why most people keep their cones too tight.