Mopedenthusiast was right! Brennan is an asshole

david /
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Brennan O. messed Jim's bike up deliberately and you people helped plan it, deny it and flame him and anyone else who disagreed with you.

And when painfulecho blows the whistle, the thread is locked by Harold. After 100 posts, most of which say "SUCK HIS DICK," homeland security decides the future of the nation is at stake. HaHa! you fucking dorks! And you say I use the word 'groupthink' too much?

How about camp followers (those being the male and female whores that follow armies in campaigns). Some army, some campaign. Can't even piss straight.

Are you branch people actually dim enough to think the truth would not come out?

First clue: erinl, who is thick as a brick, posts as fast as her lips can move over the page of the script you people put together. Two: erinm, who 'retired' this year and posted some disgruntled feelings about MA, clocks in with H2C.

This ought to help with making non-members pay for this site, haha!

Ah, but revenge is the best revenge, so I'm going to have fun with you people. As some of you know, I'm an author, speechwriter, former journalist and currently a media relations consultant. I have also worked closely with the RCMP (the real one, not the gang), the Ontario Provincial Police and the International Association of Police Chiefs. Tight group. I have many of their business cards right here, and also that of the president of the IACP Survivors Club, for whom I obtained media coverage a few years back that he said "saved police officers lives" because several cities adopted mandatory flak jackets for their police forces after seeing the coverage.

Mr. McBride is an ex-FBI man and retired police chief living in Kentucky. He said if I ever needed a favour "of any kind" to just call him. I have a better idea:

Dear Mr. McBride:

You'll recall the 2003 IACP convention at the Hockey Hall of Fame, Toronto, in which The Survivors' Club honoured those RCMP officers whose lives were saved by their Kevlar vests. I was pleased to obtain those television interviews for you then and help save officers lives. Little did I know that the action would snowball, and that many more police forces, firefighters and outside city employees across this great continent of ours are now mandating Kevlar vests for protection, as the streets are not as safe as they used to be.

I write not to ask a favour of you, but to alert you and your fellow police chiefs about a growing threat to law and order in your country. A group calling itself the Moped Army, originally composed of alternative-society types in Kalamazoo, MI has now spread across the country, coast-to-coast-to-coast. In 10 years, its ranks have grown to well over 400 people in about 25 underground cells of anarchist whose sole objective is to bring disruption to society and the economy. There is even a branch called the Bourbon Bandits in your place of residence in Kentucky. We have been able to keep them out of Canada so far, but they recruit at a frightening pace.

The people in these cells steal, commit fraud, smuggle drugs and guns across the country, all for their cause, which is a kind of jihad for lashing out at society. These people are not to be taken lightly. They gather from across the country at moped rallies, at which goods are fenced, guns illegally altered and sold, drugs trafficked and consumed. Then there is a fight club scenario, with much illegal betting. Whether the money they collect goes to a central fund or remains with the cells I do not know, but an IRS audit of the Moped Army would probably produce a paper trail.

They flout the law at every turn: not only traffic laws, which the Kalamazoo police can tell you about, as there was a 'rally' there on Memorial Day weekend, at which the members boasted of theft, fraud, willful property damage and the kidnapping of a 17-year-old from Sioux Falls, Dakota, who was forced to drink underage and do the Good Lord knows what else. It has gotten so bad that the original founders, Simon King and Dan Webber Kastner, have moved away from Kalamazoo and take no further responsibility for The Moped Army.

Of great concern is that they are planning a fundraising drive to finance their activities, plying impressionable teenagers from across the country to give them money for "the moped lifestyle," which has become a euphemism for their activities. Although they travel around on small 50cc bikes, that is just a cover; they are the next great threat to the social fabric, a Hells Angels-type of gang that tries to fly under the radar by appearing to be harmless and someone nerdy. They are anything but.

I hope I have not unduly alarmed you; I think the best course of action is to..................

Sincerely,

David C. Coates

For the punchline, you lazy buggers will have to read 'Barney's Version' by Mordechai Richler, to find out the type of thing that will be visited upon you. Erinl is allowed Cliff Notes.

Then it's off to the Kzoo weekly to warn them about giving publicity to anarchists ("Ask the Kzoo police, Amy; when an offier tried to ticket some for legitimate traffic violations, he was circled-swarmed by 200 riders, like in that scene with Lee Marvin and Marlon Brando in The Wild Ones. There is no love lost between the police and moped rallies, and I hear the Kzoo police are pushing the mayor's office to ban rallies. Check with the police before you embarass yourself."

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