Why does this shit stress me out so much?
Why does this shit stress me out so much?
This is the kind of question that would ideally be posited to a therapist, but I'll bet it has to do with general social anxiety and introversion.
You should reevaluate what it is that you get out of mopeds and decide if that outweighs the anxiety aspect. Life is stressful enough, your hobbies should be something wholly relaxed
You have a moped problem...
Damn good thing it isn't zeppelin or wiener dogs...
Sounds like a general anxiety disorder.
Dude, don't think getting help means you lose something or are scum. We are all scumbags filled with red water who gives a shit.
I saw a shrink for 20 years. Not saying you absolutely need one but if your stressing over a website, ya might.
What it is, is that this thread is embarrassing.
But you still keep making them, time after time. You are asking the question, people give you an answer and then you don't listen. You then ask again a few months later, people give an answer, you ignore and on it goes. Stay here or fuck off, that's your call, but quit the 'woe me' posts if you're hanging around and just chill out a bit.
I'm not even like this IRL, but I swear the internet makes me bitch and moan about everything, always have that bad habit of making myself look like a complete ass and bring negative attention to myself. It's pretty stupid, pathetic, and sad. Taking a break from here for a bit so I stop pushing myself away from something I like sounds like a great idea. Was totally fishing for attention. (edited)
> Brandon Love Wrote:
> Was totally fishing for attention.
It's cool. Most people hear already know that and I'm sure that's why most of them keep answering you. I'd rather you post hear everyday if it helps you than for you to do something really stupid like hurt or kill yourself. I've seen it happen many times when a person doesn't have an outlet or feel alone/useless........
I think what you do with these posts takes courage. You are seeking the communication you need. Some men suffer quietly which is no good.
Keep up the good fight and try to get sunlight, exercise, and read positive stuff. Also, stay away from the booze it can be really nasty stuff when combined with troubles.
Some weak people will try to tell you to shut up or bring up the past to make you feel bad. If they do that just tell them to fuck off and keep reaching out.
Good luck brother.
> Stephen Simmons Wrote:
> I'd rather you post hear everyday if it
> helps you than for you to do something really stupid like hurt or kill
this times 100000x, you can post these threads every night if it helps you feel like you have an outlet and need to vent.
I lost a good friend a couple years ago to suicide, I knew him through moto stuff and all we ever talked about was motorcycles, engines, racing, etc. When he was going through a tough spot and wanted to talk all i wanted to do was steer the convo back to machines. I'll never be able to go back to that bar on that day and sit down with him and be real, and i'll never make that mistake again.
If you ever feel like you posted something embarassing and you want it gone, you can report it or PM me and i'll delete it.
What do you do, Brandon, go on and off your meds every couple of months?
Suppose he does, that is his personal business and should not be used to invalidate him!
I suppose that came out wrong. I've dealt with seasonal depression before, myself. Lows in the fall and highs in the spring. I think I am affected by the amount of sunlight exposure or lack of it. Balance out whatever helps you cope; meds, and counselling, and get outside into the sunlight and fresh air as much as possible.
Hop on a motorized vehicle with pedals of the 49cc variety and go for an occasional ride? That always puts a smile on my face.
Excellent stuff. I hope Brandon reads this and knows that everyone here does actually want to see him happy.
What's really bullshit, is how I've always had some dickhead trying to push me away from this. That's why I made the thread, because of what happened in the other thread I made I was really stressed out and depressed about it, I shouldn't give people power like that over me. Has a lot to do with having extremely low self esteem. Reaching out on a moped forum is a bit awkward. (edited)
Hey Brandon, I'm new one here so you don't know me from Adam but this is something I know a bit about (unlike mopeds).
I closely guard my mental health because I have to, I avoid the news (I catch highlights) can't watch David Attenborough, there are loads of triggers, try to find yours.
Now I'm not in your shoes so can't say "I know what your going through", but you need to find ways to vent. If you feel you can vent on here, do it, don't worry about what some may say because clearly there are people here who genuinely care, willing to listen and are trying to help.
If there are things you can't open up to another human being about, whether a therapist, friend, family or stranger, write it out. I find writing stuff down has really helped me get shit out of my head, and the act of writing helps process/filter, sometimes you see it going down on paper and think "really, why has that got me so twisted?". Once it's down on paper, you don't need to keep it, burn it!!
And always have a project, anything that you can think about (that truly interests you) instead things that'll get down.
Just my 2p buh, hope it helps
Really got into this for the social aspect, and mopeds. Damn, haven't I fucked up and had some shit luck on the social part. (edited)
> Brandon Love Wrote:
> Really got into this for the social aspect, and mopeds. Damn, haven't I
> fucked up and had some shit luck on the social part.
Nauh, you've just reached out to the wrong people. This is a community. If all we did was ride mopeds it would'nt be a "community" To ME "communities" help one another with EVERYTHING that's needed. You need a moped? Done. You need a part or help fixing it? Done. You need a ride to a rally weather you have money or not? Done. You just wanna hang out and get waisted? Done. If you need some one to talk to that should be DONE! No questions asked. That's what we are supposed to be here for because this is a COMMUNITY. Now sure your going to bump into a few assholes. IT happens everywhere you go. Those are just SELFISH peoples who only case about THEMSELVES and no one else. You cross them off the list when you come in contact with those types. 95% of the comment on this thread should show you that the most of us care and will help in anyway we can so keep posting because we're listening and trying to help you the best we can.
When I’m feeling down I hop on my bike and cruise for about 30-45 minutes.
When I’m on my machine, that I built and put all my energy into, nothing else matters just me, my steed, and the road.
I am in complete control of everything around me in a world where sometimes I feel is completely out of control.
Just ride man, that’s all there is to it.
And rev hard at people, that too duh.
I can just say that there was a lot of shit going on that most of you won't understand. I was just in a shitty place in many ways, I just lashed out at the wrong people instead of lashing out at the people who actually had caused the problems I was going through.
I do something similar. I'm afraid of directly confronting the people who piss me off and instead find a passive aggressive way to blow off steam and hope others will step up and do the confronting.
My best friend screwed me out of $500 6 years ago and I didn't talk to him for 2 years. I wrote about it on my Facebook page 5 yeasts ago, the posts are still there, but I bet he's never read it and doesn't know that it still pisses me off.
I had an Amish boss that i worked with for 2 years that found just about every way possible to take advantage of me. If I had to put a dollar figure on it, which is the only way that the money grubbing son of a bitch could grasp how angry I still am, it would be to the tune of $80k.
My wife and kids have been such lazy fucktards these last 6 or 7 years that I could just beat them all to death. Instead, I have written about their shenanigans on my Facebook page almost every day for the last 5 years, hoping they might read it and change their attitude.
None of it has worked, and when I argue to their face, I get "Did you take your meds?" What the hell is me taking an anti-depressant got to do with them doing chores around the house to clean up messes that THEY make and leave for me to deal with? I don't dirty THEIR dishes or THEIR clothes, so why am I taking care of their mess?
My in-laws give me an intervention in 2003. I don't drink, take drugs, gamble, cheat on my wife, or physically abuse anyone, and I have been home with the kids since 1999. My intervention was because my wife, at the time, had lost her job and I wasn't earning enough money to keep HER in the manner to which she had been accustomed. The intervention was given to me by my drunk, alcoholic mother when was so shit faced that she couldn't walk unassisted, my obese sister-in-law who couldn't and still hasn't lost enough weight to get her knee fixed and get her tummy tuck, a chain smoking, pot smoking sister-in-law, and a recovering alcoholic sister-in-law who, like her mother, was once hospitalized for a fecal compaction, which translates as "I was so drunk and so screwed up that I couldn't shit and my shit had to be dug out with a spoon after I was put under.
Despite getting a substitute teacher's license at the time, maintaining some police software I had written, and acting as a part time school custodian covering for my sister-in-law while her child was dying, I just wasn't earning as much money as my wife could if she took a part time job, so it was better for her to collect unemployment and stay home at the time, while her father had died 4 years before that, and due to estate planning, we had close to a quarter million dollars in a magical account somewhere that she couldn't touch. A year later after her mother dies and my best friend dies in the same week, I'm in the garage with the car running.
So if my wife bitches about 25 mopeds, it's been scoping mechanism for the way I have been treated the last half of our marriage.
I know how you feel, and I hope it gets better for you.
I am impressed that despite everyone around you being so terrible you persevere and call out their bullshit. Some people just have terrible luck and end up surrounded by horrible people. I am really impressed that you realize it all and haven't been gaslit by their intervention nonsense.
Stay strong, things will get better or they won't but all you can do is control yourself.
I’m trying to construct a metaphor with mopeds.
They are simple machines that constantly are demanded to give 100% and they ask for very little in return. To satisfy our desire, we push them to the brink of self destruction, or beyond. Then, without apology, we get them up and running just to do it again.
Maybe some of us relate to that work ethic and have a deep appreciation for something so humble and selfless? Maybe it’s an outlet for some oppressed become the oppressor bullshit and we flog the poor little machine relentlessly?
We all (people and machines) handle stress in different ways. Some have it easy and some get a life of extra duty. My little Africa motorcycle has been asked to do the work of a truck on roads that look like a tank proving ground. It shows. It has scars all over. It has “coped” in ways that aren’t ideal but were necessary. It shows more wear for its age than bikes 5X as old in better locations.
So, where do you feel you fit in this picture?
If i was born, or made rich. If I was smarter, stronger, faster. I could have an easy life. Reality for me is somewhere in the middle I suppose. I had to learn to take on the burdens of life in pieces, because carrying it all at once just isnt possible for me.
Friends and Family can be especially heartless in this endeavor. When it isn’t “their turn” in the never ending relay to move the whole mess down the road, they bitch and complain. Lash out with accusations and refuse to help because they feel neglected.
I have made progress with this in my own life. Getting my wife to understand the pressure I experience, whether she sees it that way or not, and how much sacrifice it is to constantly feel like I am struggling to satisfy the wants and needs of others while neglecting my own dreams and desires. Watching the sand run out of the hourglass of my life and covering less and less ground as the burdens pile on.
I am getting in a better place. For one, I found a better job. The Air Force is like a good friend with a truck. I still have my fair share of work to do, but they do much of the heavy hauling. I have found ways to relate my feelings to my friends and family that gets more understanding and empathy . Instead of me just barking at them when they do stuff that makes my life harder.
I am lucky to be surrounded by mostly good people. We can fight, but we can communicate and make up. If I was around truly toxic people, I would move on. But, when you know the stuff to look for, it becomes apparent that we all are just broken down in different ways. Become the mechanic. Work on yourself and then work on the people around you. It might surprise you how much smoother things can run.
Mopeds as a metaphor for my life...
OMDG it all makes sense now...
Thanks for the moment of clarity...
I am as my moped is. Beaten tired overworked repaired haphazardly and parts are getting hard to come by.
I'm a caregiver for my mother. Living at home with my alcoholic drug addicted sister, and similarly endowed friend from hs. I brought him home 15 years ago when we were friends and he needed some here to go. He's still here.
My daily grind has basically become that of a father since my dad died last year. Dishes, garbage, everything falls to me. Because for some reason I'm the only person that cares. I have two 30 year old children. I help with all the bills, they contribute nothing. And they feel entitled to esteem when we argue, because the lawn is mowed every two months. And they did that! Jeeze
My mother has chosen to relinquish herself of all stress through ignorance. So nobody is ever put in their place for misdoings, as she won't. I attempt to, and am the evil bad guy. Because I don't get high anymore, I can't afford to be fucked up if somthing goes wrong. I have no friends here, no life, and not a single person I can trust with somthing as simple as "I'm going to go for a drive, can you heat up mom's dinner at 5? It's on the top shelf"
I make barely any money, and have at 31 nothing at all to show. And after my mom passes all I have is a 10 year career in healthcare that no employer would care about. Over 200 certifications, that mean absolutely dick. Because I'm not a nurse or doctor.
I can truly say, that if someone offered me a spot to pitch a tent. I would pack my shit and leave...
But I'm still here. it's fucked up for everyone man. I feel the edge of a mental break coming closer every day.
1.) Wake up before sunrise every morning for a week straight. Dont be a pussbag and give up after 2 days. EVERY FUCKING DAY FOR A WEEK.
2.) Get up, make coffee, and get your ass outside within 20 minutes TOPS. Also,
**DO NOT LOOK AT OR BRING YOUR GOD DAMN PHONE**
3.) Either walk in your neighborhood or drive to a trail or whatever and just walk for AT LEAST 2 miles. Not 1, or 1½, but TWO FUCKING MILES.
4.) Get home, wash your balls, and then write down how you feel.
Give it a week.
It may suck at first.
But you'll start to enjoy it.
Then you'll start to need it.
Then you'll realize "LoL, it's just mopeds".
And mopeds are life.
Everyone is medicated by their distraction of choice. Everyone will be a bully when it suits them.
My later in life position has helped me to see a clearer view of what is worth concern and what isn't... and to lead by example. Don't be a dick and don't let yourself be dicked with. Have no concern for the "feelings" of the dickish. Don't work to find dickishness in what you see and hear. The shit doesn't stick if you don't let it.
im really sorry
we lost my brother-in-law a few years ago and it forever altered the life trajectory of every single member of our family
I have a brother-in-law I wouldn't mind "losing". Recovering alcoholic that didn't do the twelve steps, still drinks "non-alcoholic" beer, can't throw a family dinner without wine, a full bar of hard liquor, bucket full of beer, twisted tea, wine coolers, water, and ice for all the guests, son that drinks, 9 year-old grandkids that have access to the liquor cabinet and get their parents a breakfast in bed with wine and Cheerios because at that tender age they already know that EVERY family celebration MUST include alcohol. Those poor kids won't have a chance of not becoming the 6th generation of alcoholics in the next few years. But if you say something, the response is "we aren't alcoholics".
Yeah, great folks, my in-laws.
I love the saying, "Everyone loves it when you are honest, but when you are honest about THEM, you are just being an asshole."
Trent, we related? Lol
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