Junkyard Wars

Reeperette /

Now, dunno if y'all know this - but I don't watch TV....in fact, I mostly despise TV, between monica, OJ, and Jerry Springer I hear too damn much about it anyhow, and it's nothin I really pay a mind to.....anyhows...

I got badgered into watchin this junkyard wars show, right...

The whole time I am sittin there critiqueing, bitching, and pointing out the DUMBass flaws in the constructions (like, not makin sure it RUNS before you build a vehicle around it...) and thinkin some of us would do a far, far better job.

And the more I thought about it, the more it occurred to me that we should indeed at least make the attempt to field a team.

Mopeds, believe it or not, ain't my specialty, nor computers...imma gadgeteer, I mean hell, I designed the prosthetic I wear, more or less - and believe me, it's quite superior to anything else you'd find.

Not to mention handbuilding a cross-brand airconditioner unit, moped engine crossovers, etc...I figure most moped folks are fellow gadgeteers.

So here lies the point - I wanna field a team.

For preference, I'd like Me, Fred and Wayne on it...but that's if all are interested, have the time, and would wish to get into this insanity.

Me..imma up for it, obviously..and regardless of who, I'd sure like to draw the entire team from this forum....cause I bet we'd kick ass.

So...Fred, Wayne...anyone else...you up for it ?

I am quite wholly serious, and the link to last years application page is here.


They'll be lookin for more yahoo's for the show around Jan 3rd 2002, and I fully intend to be in that running.

So how about it, folks ?


Re: Junkyard Wars

Interesting... because that kind of stuff is right up my alley.

I have worked as a machinery designer.. making engineering drawings..

I have worked as a fabricator.

I've done quite a bit of machining...and parts cutting... and fitting/welding... torch cutting.. all that

And operated all the power tools needed for most anything.

Plus.... I envision how to use the materials at hand... all the time.

What I would be curious to see is how they choose competitors.. because anything involving TV includes a lot of BS.

I would expect to be disappointed in the process.

But ... I suppose I would be game to apply/try.

Don't they use teams of 4 ??

Then we want Ron in on this.

I have thought it odd that you, him, and I all live on the outskirts of the Detroit area.

Re: Junkyard Wars

I think you guys would be unbeatable,Ree! You gotta get Ron in there for electrical too,you know.Somebody's gotta help Wayne with the stereo wiring.

Re: Junkyard Wars

Ron Brown /


I second Fred's comments, are you going to see what it takes?


Re: Junkyard Wars

Junkyard wars is a kickass show. I personally am not one for hands on mechanics. Give me a schematic or a manual and I can build whatever and then improve it 10 times over, I basically have no knowledge on cars or anything until I read the manual. Photographic memory here. Well I think it sounds like a great idea for you to invest your time into. I'll be expecting an autograph if you all make it. LOL happy thanksgiving guys.

Re: Junkyard Wars

Reeperette /

Well, supposedly they use teams of three, but if Wayne's ok with it, I say we go with Me, Fred and Ron...cause we all live close enough to actually work this out a bit easier, which I hadn't thought of right off, but it does make sense when ya think about it.

I dunno how they pick the teams out, but I am sure we can make an impression of sorts (I think they'd prolly find it cute that one of the team members is partly mechanical himself, heh) and we could appeal to the grouchy ole bastard mechanic stereotype....so we got a lot of bases covered there as well.

My forte is bizarre gadgetry, and decades of repair experience in situations where the proper parts and tools were never available...I tend towards solutions that at times surpass the standard by-the-book methods.

As for "what it takes" Ron, between you, me and Fred...I think we have all the "right stuff" one could want, aged to perfection as well (heh) and with a seasoning of real life experience that would give us an advantage over most.

I should know sometime in early January whether they'll be using the same application process as last time, or a new one, but upon reading the old one it don't seem like anything we can't handle.

To quote a friend of mine, upon hearing of this...

"My god, that show will never be the same!"

Lets have at em, as I said, I've already submitted pre-app, that doesn't require the team to be complete at the time, just one interested party.

Hehehe, they won't know what hit them.


PS- last nights show, the dragsters ? MY first consideration was an aircompressor, or similar device powering air-pressure gasoline rockets.

They would prolly have canned that idea for safety reasons, but you never know.

Re: Junkyard Wars

I have only seen the show twice...

... but from what I've seen... there is definitely some hokey stuff they (the show) pull... they without a doubt plan the projects for the teams... so the solutions are somewhat ... "there"... already.

.. and I will say one other thing.

With us 3 Michiganders... we really are actually still missing one thing for sure... non of us are really hard core mechanics... I am talking about a guy who has repaired cars or trucks (for a living) for 20 plus years.

I consider myself a 'good' mechanic... but there are things people learn from doing it for a living that you can't just by 'fiddling'.

On the other hand... some of those 'professional mechanics' have next to no creativity.

Me?... I'm half mechanic.. half designer... half fabricator... (and I still can't count)

Oh yeah... something else... My last "real" job... I was foreman/general manager of a 15 man fabricating shop... so I am a summmmbitch too... : )

Re: Junkyard Wars

I have only seen the show twice...

... but from what I've seen... there is definitely some hokey stuff they (the show) pull... they without a doubt plan the projects for the teams... so the solutions are somewhat ... "there"... already.

.. and I will say one other thing.

With us 3 Michiganders... we really are actually still missing one thing for sure... non of us are really hard core mechanics... I am talking about a guy who has repaired cars or trucks (for a living) for 20 plus years.

I consider myself a 'good' mechanic... but there are things people learn from doing it for a living that you can't just by 'fiddling'.

On the other hand... some of those 'professional mechanics' have next to no creativity.

Me?... I'm half mechanic.. half designer... half fabricator... (and I still can't count)

Oh yeah... something else... My last "real" job... I was foreman/general manager of a 15 man fabricating shop... so I am a summmmbitch too... : )

Re: Junkyard Wars

I'm okay-- I'm a professional "bodger" but don't have a lot of engineering or fabrication experience-- Plus, I'm a long way away I think you three would be a kick-ass team

Noticed that too, eh ?

Reeperette /

You noticed that too, eh ?

Not only did the designs seem quite "contrived" (as in having the basic plans more or less handed to them) but some of the material looked "planted" to me as well.

I thought about possibly enlisting a professional auto mechanic or an electrician, but decided against it cause of the point that Fred makes on it - lack of imagination.

If we are to excell in this, using (more or less) standard-issue approaches just ain't gonna do it, and I would prefer to veer away from that and rely more on an unbiased viewpoint.

If they just hand us the plans and plant the parts, welllll...we shall just see what workarounds we can manage....believe me, there is enough fudge-factor in any design for a little "imagination".

As for the "angle" that'd likely get us on the show, i'd bet it has about jack to do with actual mechanical ability, and a lot to do with showmanship...and they want a show, we can give em one.

Us three "crafty old bastards" can play a stereotype quite well, and I say we play to it.


Re: Noticed that too, eh ?

Ron Brown /

Who the hell are you calling old?

Re: Noticed that too, eh ?

So... when are we going to hook up on the FA50 handoff ? (grill? too??)

Shoot me a likely day and time.

I do most of my communication by email now.

I'll have to try to watch that show a few more times.

They absolutely 'plant' stuff.

From the 2 I've seen... I'm certain they also 'bootstrap' the competition to bring everybody up to speed... by the time the competition starts... it wouldn't be any good for TV if they didn't.

Re: Junkyard Wars

Hey.. I'm pretty new to the 6 volt moped world... but I will be graduating from tech school this quarter for auto mechanics. Anouther plus I can weld :0)

Re: Junkyard Wars

Wow i posted that before readint he other posts...

maybe we could talk the show into letting you older moped farts go against the newbie mopeders .. That would be good fun.

I've worked int he auto field in a private shop for about 6 years now.. we have done alot of coustom jobs... amazingly enough my wildest job was putting a chevy 350 into a austin minor. :0)

I've watched the show alot too and it does see a bit "hoaxed" but it is kinda fun.

what would be Mega super duper cool would be new vs. old in a real junkyard to build a two wheeled "moped/motorcycle" from scratch... and have it compete for the fastest.. have some jumps for fastest on off road coarse and the best styling. maybe do it on teams of 4... 100 each person should buy the parts (or we could make freind with a junkyard owner) God now that would be fun..

It wont ever happen but its fun to dream..... maybe you guys will get on the show.. that would be pretty damn cool too

Meep meeep...... poo'geo comming through!

Re: Noticed that too, eh ?

I looked into getting a team together, after beeing pestered by friends here in town. The teams are selected by a video that illustrates a scientific principle. This audition tape is what you have to go thru the first round of selections. On the website, they admit to setting up and hiding items in the yard. I know I've never seen a submarine and a few airplains in one yard all at the same time. I didn't form a team here because, well, all my friends are lazy bastards who talk a hell of a lot more than they actually do something.

I got so pissed with all the usless bastards that I went for battlebots instead. Now battlebots has turned their rules into 2 75 page books, and legislated everything to death, so I just can't compete. Can't really blame them, they had one of the "contestants" break a weapon and throw a chunk thru 1" thick lexan.

Maby we should start Moped wars or something. You think Speedvision would pick up the bar-b-que race?

Re: Noticed that too, eh ?

Simon King /

The other thing is that you don't really need to be an expert in the field you're bulding something in. They give in an "expert" to use for your team. From what I've seen on some show they end up directing much of the action if the team gets confused or doesn't know where to start on something. I think that they personalities between you guy could get you on the show. I'd love to see it.


Junkyard Wars (Suitcase car)

popular science--- J.W. article.


neat project I came across while looking for the new 3 wheeled segway type vehicle shown in this months popular science....the three wheeled segway thing wasn't on the popsci home page, but this was.


We could still slaughter em.

We would have mopped the floor with em...

But they never even bothered to respond to the pre-app I sent, didn't keep up with their mailing list, nor inform applicants of the process in any way.

Checked with some other folks, who also felt their original contact Emails fell into the void or something, and for the most part people lost interest cause the folks running the show flatly ignored em and gave em no information one way or the other, ever.

I dunno about other folks, but I found that insulting enough, to never, ever be told anything, to not remain interested in the process - there was never any confirmation of receipt of the mails, no updates (which were promised) and they didn't even have the decency to tell us once they'd already selected the folks they were gonna pick, so screw em.

In my opinion the quality of the show started to go down around that time too, it becoming more and more obvious when parts were "planted" and designs were "handed" to the teams, and almost completely built by the shows planted "expert" on the team.

Dunno about you, but damned if I would play parts gopher to go grab pre-planted material to build something I had no hand in designing, for some guy who's gonna put it together without my input or assistance.

Especially since I could prolly do ten times better turned loose in a junkyard and machine shop with a mission in mind.

They took a right good idea and then reduced it to something as "real" as WWF wrestling, and to me that's a damned shame.


Re: B-Bots, S.R.L., Junk Wars


you're right about the whole J.W. thing. At first, they were doing things you could REALLY do in a decent junkyard. The cannons, catapults, basic motor vehicles, off road machines.... boats....even the amphibious vehicles.

when they started "building" submarines, planes, and other more complex machines, it became clear that the junkyard was "stocked" before each show....and even though they used clever editing, you could tell there wasn't really a "time-limit".

The first couple seasons of J.W. were great.

I haven't seen Battlebots in a long time. I loved that show, the few complaints were Jay Leno and his 100k robot. That's lame....using your cash to smash apart an amateur builders machine. Also, once the "ringmaster" would continue to bash a disabled bot with the sledgehammer. That's just mean--and costly to the folks who invest their time, money, blood, sweat and tears.

It's okay when another bot blows you to pieces, but an evil ringmaster going nuts with a sledgehammer button.... That's just lame. from the looks on the builders faces, you could pretty much tell that they weren't going to get "reimbursed" for the sledge damage.

Here's a great link for anyone interested in Junkyard wars or battlebots. In a lot of ways, these guys started the whole "building from junk" and "making violent machines"

Survival research labs:


Re: B-Bots, S.R.L., Junk Wars

I'd make a battle bot with a small tazer attached tha tyou just rid eup to the other bot... shock its electrical system to hell then roll the limp bot into the hole.

Re: B-Bots, S.R.L., Junk Wars

Rules prohibit flame, shock, or projectiles such as nets or bullets.

Nice idea though. Just have a big tesla coil fry the other bot.

or an EMP pulser, and make sure your own bot has industrial shielding on the boards. sneak that one past the judges. A mini version of the thing they detonated in Oceans 11

That was my thought, too.

Focused EMP backed up by super extra heavy shielding, or components not very susceptible to EMP.

There's more than one way to generate that type of interference, FYI, which is one reason the FCC has so many regulations concerning devices, just so ya know.

One sure-fire, but probably illegal, way to wax the other bots would be by microwave emitter, not the chintzy kind in a mini microwave neither, the high-end blaster used in phone towers - you could most certainly FRY the guts of another bot with one of those... but you might bag some of the studio audience too, tho in my opinion, that's THEIR problem, heh.

Another good weapon, tho I consider it a bit fragile for the purpose, would be the "Heat Ray" I built for science class one year after reading War of the Worlds.

It's not a lazer, but a million candlepower dive light focused through a tube of stacked convex lenses, the same principle as using a magnifying glass to fry ants, but on a somewhat larger scale.

Mosta the effective nastiness I would arm a robot with, however, would be regarded with shock and horror even prior to the institution of those rules, just cause they're so abysmally nasty.

Would a twin barrel epoxy sprayer be classed as a "projectile weapon" ? probably. (and a solvent sprayer in our robot to keep it's own motive power system clear..)

70mm x 150mm shaped charge, impact-detonated rocket launcher with an 18 round gravity feed clip ? that'd be right out, too, wouldn't it ?

The one thing I could contribute to such a bot that might pass would be a sandwich style layered armor plate of surprising effectiveness, but that's one secret imma keep to myself.

The really pyscho thing is that I have, in my youth, BUILT most of the widgets above, with the exception of the microwave emitter..

Are thermal lances forbidden too ? if one could get past the fragility problems of such a device, they could make awful short work of any bot that came near it, not to mention chop the obstacles into fodder too !

(I've never seen the show, mind...)


Re: That was my thought, too.

woulder if you could make your bot have some super corrosive solvent in a cup made fomr a material it didn't effect and just pour it on the opponeant.

Acids would rule

Re: Junkyard Wars

A prostetic what?


These guys would be great in a show, Ron helped me w/ my PA50 and Fred is the advice king

Re:That was my thought(SRL!!)


you really have to check our SRL.ORG if you haven't already.

They have a boeing engine....but they attached huge whistles to it as well as a an additional fuel line to make it spray a vortex of fire.

They built a "2X4 Cannon" that fires the boards at like 400mph. Auto-feed. Remote controlled-- sometimes if you get lucky you can be one of the folks at home who gets to participate in a live show---controlling the board shooter via the internet.

They have a spring hand....the default is the "closed" position. BUT they use hydraulics to haul the hand open.... until it is ready to 'snap' closed like a mousetrap. They call it the hand of god.

They also have video of their suicide bots trying to attack the tesla tower.....which keeps striking the closest bot.

They also have a huge grasping articulated arm.... the wearer has a mini version, linked to the huge one electronically. In demos he'll pick up an anvil and drop it right in front of someone... not to mention the mini wearable control arm is HOT stuff too.

They build pulse jets, flame whistles, hovercraft, violent massive junkyard robots that are, without question, very lethal.

They build larger than human sized robots, that have helicoptor rotors at mid-torso level... and they fire these things up in front of a live crowd..... and drive it around by remote.

They will sometimes purchase slaughtered cows and pigs... and mount them on one robot and drive it into the blades, the flame, or the hand of god. Just so you see how remote control death interacts with biological matter.

massive, scary deadly live shows--they've got a guy who just runs the clay pigeon shooter, and fires object at all the bots during the performance.

They have some kind of pulse cannon that makes a sonic shockwave that you can feel more than hear--but it sounds like a sonic boom---

I am not kidding, they did a show in europe, and people called the ministries of defense to report air strikes.

In one clip, they fire a replica of a V-2 engine in front of the ROXY theater in L.A. That's their idea of a halloween prank.

They used to do illegal rave-style underground shows... under bridges and such....

huge saws, a machine designed ONLY to fire continual showers of molten sparks.... I think they feed raw metal into the input port, and have a bunch of huge griinding stones and a blower-----

I have some of their shows on videotape. Mind blowing.

If you like destruction, mayhem and killer robots--- check out SRL.ORG


Re: Junkyard Wars

I wish we watched that show in my house. I have a wife that watches all the crap. "The Bachelor" for one. The other disgusting one is "Anna Nicole". I have been forced to sit throug a few minutes of that one and I think to myself, 'No wonder people from all over the world think we are morally depraved and want to kill us'.

Gotta go now, there's Porn to be surfed.

Re: Junkyard Wars

Shit.. I would be in hog heaven with that stuff...

we make little crap around here.. recently after seeing some people playing with litttle cork guns and potatoe guns.. we decided that wasn't good enough and made a Potatoe Cannon.. we made it out of 3 inch round pvc pipe about 6 foot long with 6 inch pvc chamber.. you shove a potato down in it and stuff it down with a broom stick... then on the other end there is a screw on cap you spray it full of hair spary and hurriedly screw the cap back on... on the end of the cap on the outside we drilled a hole and put a grill stricker starter on it.. and jb wleded it in place... you get the hair spray in point it then slap the grill starter and BOOM that potatoe probly flys atleast 200 yards... it goes damn near half way across the lake... we popped a floating bouy and shot it so high stright up we couldn't see it anymore...

Fun oh Fun.. if we ever do get attacked... im painting the potato gun camo and im going to go sit in a tree and wait.. lol

Answer to that.

Prosthetic Leg, from just below the knee.

It's a pretty awesome one, although it trades off in ankle unit flexibility for the incredible strength and durability.

It also locks on, so you don't have to worry about it coming off if you decide to kick your front door in cause you were a dumbass and left yer keys on top of the fridge...


You need a kickass build, just call Dr Aziz Nasir (They call him "Ozzy") down at MOS Services, and he'll do ya up right.

Frankenstein got nothin on that guy.


"potato" Gun Fires pumpkin a mile


This is an awesome story. gives you all kinds of ideas.

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